Holidays

I wanted to post a little about our holidays.  Adam had 2.5 weeks off work, so we had lots of family time this year.  I was about 7 months pregnant but still feeling good, so we were able to get outside and do some fun things together.  Cross country skiing, sledding skating, building snow forts etc.
I do sometimes make the mistake of thinking that I can do anything with this body.  Two on two basketball with Adam, my dad and my brother reminded me that it's easier to strain these stretched out abdominal muscles.  An Insanity video reminded me that jumping around isn't the best thing for me at this stage.  No serious injuries from either, just a bit more sore than I'd like to be at this stage.  We pushed back our day to go skiing, so that I could make sure I was recovered from the basketball.

After a two hour wait in line, the kids got to see Santa 

The other big excitement for our family was that Dallin and Marie got married!  My little brother is all grown up.

I know I've blogged before about pregnancy dreams.  Well, a few nights ago I woke up and I had lifted the lamp shade off the lamp on the nightstand.  While holding it and wondering what to do, I called out, "Adam".  Then I realized, I probably didn't need his help with this, set the shade down and went back to sleep.  So. Very.  Strange.

I've also been preparing items for my home birth.  Yep, I'm gonna try to deliver at home.  Just to make other people uncomfortable.  I like what one comedian said when he told others that his wife was delivering at home.  They would respond, "oh, we thought about doing that, but we wanted our baby to live."  But really, I have great trust in the skills of my midwives and the seton hospital is a five min drive if there's any reason to be there.

I'm enjoying my workouts at the gym and can be seen there about four times a week doing low impact cardio and weights.  Look for the tall pregnant girl in the sweet compression socks.  I think I kind of stand out.  This Friday, Adam and I are going to play squash and go for a swim because he has the day off work and the kids are in school for the morning.  Yes, this could be another case of me thinking this pregnant body can do anything I ask it to...we'll see how it goes.  I am grateful for how much good nutrition and exercise have helped me through this and my other two pregnancies.

Some little thoughts about THOUGHTS.

I like to put little notes up on my bathroom mirror once in awhile.   I've had this one up for awhile and I've left it up because it remains helpful to me;

"You get what you think about, whether you want it or not."

Found that little nugget in a book by Wayne Dyer, whom I love.
I read a study awhile ago where they analyzed data on the location of highway traffic accidents.  In the study, they found a high percentage of accidents occurred where people crashed into utility poles. Much higher than it should have been statistically.  Why would this happen?  Well, you can imagine that many of these drivers were likely thinking, "don't hit the pole, don't hit the pole, don't hit the pole."

A few weeks ago Kyla had a little surgery on her ears.

A couple nights after the surgery I was talking with her before bed.  I said, "Kyla, you'll probably find tomorrow that your ears don't hurt anymore.  They are getting so much better now, so you probably won't feel pain anymore."  I mentioned to Adam about our little conversation and he laughed because he had said pretty much exactly the same thing to her before saying goodnight to her.  And guess what?  The next morning she woke up happy and said she didn't need or want medicine.  Yes, yes, I know that timing was part of this, as her ears truly were healing but I believe her thoughts were a more powerful part.

I remember when I nursed my two babies, I loved to read at the same time.  Might as well multi task, right?  I remember on multiple occasions I would read something that made me feel good and all of a sudden my milk would start flowing like a fire hose and my baby would have to come off for air.  If good, positive thoughts effect my milk supply like that , then what else are they doing to my physical body.  I believe there are powerful, unseen physical changes that occur in our bodies when we fill our minds with good thoughts.

I was speaking with my midwife at my last appt about how my previous experiences preparing mentally for some big races have helped prepare me to have this baby.  I told her that I've learned how unhelpful 'worry' is.  I've learned that it really does nothing good for me.  Sure, it's good to be aware of difficult things that are coming and to proactively prepare for them, but 'worry'....all that has done is cripple me.  I have learned that I perform best in races when I trust my body and relax into it, which is the same with labour and probably a lot of other things in life.

Daddy Daughter Time.

I'm 29 weeks pregnant now!  Rocking my compression socks, oh yeah!

Once a week my dad and I spend time together.  When the weather was nice and earlier in my pregnancy, we went for runs down in fish creek together.  I'm done with running as of a couple weeks ago (hurt my foot and concerned about the impact on my veins), so we meet at the gym to spin together.

Today was fun.  Something you should know about my dad is that he doesn't like to interrupt his workouts for anything, yep he's kind of intense like that (you wonder where I get it from right?!?).  It's more of a comical intensity though because for my dad most things have a comical aspect.  So today he was wearing two pairs of shorts and he started getting warm, so he asked, "do you think I can take off my outer pair of shorts while spinning?"  It was said with a sly grin, as if asking me to dare him to it.  Of course I obliged and then laughed my head off as he kept choppily spinning, while the first leg awkwardly came out, followed by the next.  You see the guy in the picture next to my dad?  Yeah, he had that face during the shorts removal too.

Last week was even more fun.  We were on the upright bikes, rather than the granny recumbent bikes pictured above.  We were on a random interval setting.  It was intense and I got right to it, whereas my dad likes to take his time warming up.  About 5 min into the workout, he noticed that I had burned a lot more calories and gone "further" than him.  So he told me that he was going to catch me.  Well, I couldn't resist the lure of competition so I sped up as well and raised my gears with his.

We were both sweating like crazy and unfortunately for my dad, he had forgotten his sweat towel.  Having minimal bodily function phobias, he asked if he could share my sweat towel.  "No way" I responded.  "That would be like sharing your toothbrush or your toilet paper or something.  I just can't handle it.  Sorry."  So his shirt became his sweat towel and as time progressed it became a very soaked shirt.  On the competition went, both of us suffering and egging each other on, in our friendly, fun, loving way.

Then came another setback for my dad.  He needed to blow his nose quite badly.  Tragic.  So I told him it was ok, he could just get off and I would win by forfeit.  He wasn't having any of that so he proceeded to blow his nose IN HIS SHIRT.  Then he looked down and said, "wow, now that's really gross!"  So before I could stop him he took off his shirt and kept biking topless.  I'm guessing back in the 80's it was cool for men to strut around the gym topless.  I commented that I thought he might get a reprimanding, exposing himself like that, and so he put the sweaty, mucousy shirt back on.  Awesome.

We finished the workout and I honestly can't even remember who won the competition.

I love you dad.  I enjoy our workouts together every week.  Thanks for keeping it real.

Pregnancy Tips

I thought I'd share a few pregnancy tips.  Not that I'm some guru or anything but these are just some things I've been thinking about that have been helpful to me and maybe they could be helpful to you.

• Don't compare yourself to other pregnant women.  Be kind to yourself and to others by giving each woman the respect and space to let their body do what it needs to do.

• Build up your storage of vitamins and minerals before you even get pregnant by taking a multi or prenatal vitamin daily.  I had my iron levels tested a couple years ago.  I was low so I took extra supplements for a few months and had it re-tested, to get my levels into a good place.  My iron levels have been awesome this pregnancy and I haven't felt as tired as I did my last two pregnancies.  I think once your levels are low, it's really tough to get them up during pregnancy with that precious little leech in your womb.  

• Along the same lines, I really believe in taking a good quality prenatal vitamin.  It's been proven that different brands of vitamins have much different absorption rates.  My naturopath recommended the Douglas labs "Pure" brand, which are relatively inexpensive.  I also take an extra omega 3 (for baby's brain development), zinc (cure for preventing anal fissures - a whole other story, which I'm happy to share if you're interested) and calcium/magnesium (because then I don't get any leg cramps).

• Sweat pants are your friend but you'll probably feel like a slob if you wear them everyday...I know I did. I felt more attractive when I started mixing in some jeans, makeup and doing my hair, even though sweats still have a dear place in my heart and in my wardrobe...with leggings following as a close second.

• Don't make pregnancy an excuse to eat crap all the time.  I've seen others do this, put on obscene amounts of weight and then they have to work so hard afterwards to get back to feeling good.  I do believe that some bodies will just tend to put on more weight in pregnancy, no matter how you eat (and you shouldn't beat yourself up if that's what your body tends to do because you should trust your body knows what it's doing) but don't make the damage worse by treating pregnancy like a nine month cheat day.  Not only for the weight gain issue but also for your and your baby's health...Nourish Yourself!

• Take time to rest.  Took me awhile to learn this when I was pregnant with Riley because I viewed sloth with the highest disdain and felt guilty if I wasn't productive all...the....time.  But I learned that wasn't serving me well and that, just as a worked muscle needs time to recover and rebuilt stronger, our whole bodies, as well as our minds and emotions need rest, in order to be well and balanced.  I find that I need at least one or two afternoons a week to rest (read, nap, whatever)

Spin Class

Today I did a spin class at the gym with my dad.  He's been coming with me to the gym about once a week to spend time together before baby comes.  It's been fun.

It was a one hour class but for some reason, they've decided to put the clock on the wall right at the front of the room.  That means that I am checking it, oh about every 10 seconds, and the time kind of drags on.

Today I was thinking about how I used to train for hours on end in preparation for Ironman.  How did I survive that, not just physically, but mentally!  An average training week had three spin sessions (along with three swim sessions and three run sessions).  One of the sessions was a long base training session, so I'd often be required to spin for 4-5 hours at a time.  Of course I tried to get outside on my road bike for those sessions but that wasn't always possible due to weather or child care.

So I spent hours upon hours on the corner spin bike.  Spin classes would come and go from the room, my friend Silvana would sometimes come and go but I remained..there...on the bike....in the corner of the room.....for HOURS.  

I'm so proud of that Kimmy who stuck with her goal and even enjoyed it, for the most part.  On a side note, my former self looks so skinny to my pregnant eyes but really everyone looks incredibly skinny to me right now.  It's kind of funny.

I truly am enjoying this stage of my fitness.  It's been nice to take a big step back from the intensity and just exercise for health, not for any goal or race.  I have struggled with what to actually do at the gym these days since I injured my foot a couple weeks ago and I've also been concerned about avoiding unnecessary further damage to my veins.  But there are major benefits: it gives me something to do with my mornings (both my kids are in school and I'm not doing as much personal training these days, so what else am I supposed to do with all this time).  It helps me feel emotionally well.  For example yesterday I had something on my mind bothering me and when I got home from the gym it's like the issue had shrunk in terms of my perception of it's negative impact.  Also I still feel pretty physically fit.  My cardio fitness is still in a pretty good place, as I can easily maintain 1-2 of aerobic fitness.  Also my muscles are still fairly strong.  At my midwife appt she commented, "you have quite the strong abs my dear" and my legs and arms also still have some decent muscle.  Never mind that you can't really see it because there's some extra fat storage but it's nice to know it's there. I did a pump class yesterday and it felt very comfortable.

Countdown is on with just over three months until my due date.

Marks of Motherhood

 I've wondered about the words, 'pregnant glow' lately.  Maybe that glow comes in part from being a little sweaty from having just thrown up your lunch.  Or maybe it's because you're flushed and oxygen deprived from the baby compressing your lungs.  Or maybe it's something more poetic and magical....

Pregnancy and child birth (not to mention raising the actual child) are certainly experiences that change you forever.

I've been thinking about some of these changes lately.
I've heard of so many different symptoms that female friends and family have experienced.  Depression, weight gain, nausea, insomnia, crazy dreams, joint pain, back pain, anxiety, water retention, mood swings, food aversions and migraines to name a few.  My sister's whole body would itch severely during her third trimester.  Pregnancy is so weird.

For my part, I had nausea with all three pregnancies.  I had some insomnia in my last pregnancy but thankfully not this time.  My feet were both a size 8 before I had Riley.  After that first pregnancy, they became a size 8.5  Then, miraculously after Kyla my right foot was a 9 and my left an 8.5.  It remains to be seen where my feet will end up after round three.  I had the strangest symptom after Kyla where the left side of my scalp was constantly greasy.  Didn't matter if I had just showered and blow dried my hair, that side was as greasy as if I hadn't showered in weeks.  Only solution I found was to shampoo with dish soap.  I struggled emotionally in my pregnancy with Kyla and I remember Adam saying, "I miss my Kimmy."  It was said in a sweet, longing way.  Not judgementally.  I missed myself too.

If you've spent much time with me the past month, you've probably heard me lament my most recent change that I'm grappling with: VARICOSE VEINS.  I love my legs.  They're strong, healthy, long and athletic.  I've never been much into flaunting them with high heels but I just privately find joy in them.  It's hard to see something you love become scarred.  I had some veins collapse last time but I hoped that after I had the baby they would heal up.  They didn't.  This time around, more veins have been struggling and bulging and darkening.  Not only that but they throb sometimes too.  One even has a clot in it that I will be getting an ultrasound on shortly.

It's astounding and humbling for me to consider these sacrifices.  I can picture in my mind's eye, many women that I love, offering their bodies as a vessel to bring a child into this world.  It is like they are stepping forward to an altar of sacrifice; silently, willingly, laying their offering there.  It is a deeply personal, divine experience.  It is an incredible sacrifice.  Hard, at times.  One that changes you, both inside and out, forever.

After having Kyla, my tummy carried some extra bulge.  I lamented this and obsessed over it a bit.  Then I started to learn something.  This was a mark of motherhood.  A mark on my body that I carried with me,  a sign of the sacrifice I had given.  To God this mark was beautiful.  I had a hope planted in my heart that perhaps with some time and perspective it would be beautiful to me too.  Perhaps all the marks I bear, both emotional and physical, will become incredibly beautiful to me.  They are symbols of my sacrifice.  Symbols of what I have offered.  Symbols that I am a mother.  

Six year old maternity clothes should be burned.

Ok so I'm 22 weeks pregnant now and I FINALLY decided to go through my old maternity clothes.  I've had these boxes stowed away in a closet for a long time.  Over six years to be exact.

You may wonder, what have I been wearing all this time? 

Well, I have bought some new clothes, specifically skirts and dresses but I haven't bought any shirts or pants yet.  I have a lot of long shirts, so I've just been stretching those out.  I'm totally fine with letting them get stretched out and "wrecked" because then I can throw them away after and buy new clothes.  In terms of pants, I'm down now to black sweat pants and black leggings.  I tried on all my pairs of jeans one morning last week before I went out to volunteer in my daughter's class and not a single pair fit.  No, it wasn't fun trying them all on, in case you were wondering.  

So last night I finally bit the bullet and pulled out those boxes.  It was worse than I expected....much, much worse.  Keep in mind that I was a poor student back in my previous pregnancies and I think some of the clothes I wore had even been handed down to me when I was pregnant with Riley, making them like 10 years old.  It felt like such a time warp.  A tragic time warp into maternity nightmares.  Adam laid on our bed reading a book while I groaned, moaned and sometimes laughed as I sorted through the clothing.  At the end of the experience, I laid down feeling tired and annoyed with my lack of clothing options for the next 4 months.  It's just so hard to spend money on clothes I'm only going to wear for such a short period of time.  He said something like, "Kim, pregnancy is hard enough with the changes to your body,  Don't make it harder on yourself by wearing clothes that you feel ugly in.  Spend some money and buy yourself some clothes you like.  Just donate the rest."  

Ok so before I donate these beauties, I thought I would share a few of them for your enjoyment.
I tried to really show off the two-toned tummy pouch and I think you'll also appreciate my modeling skills.

I'm still running...

Last Friday I tried to run but it just didn't feel quite right.  I felt a bit of pinching and pain in my right upper glute area.  So I did a few walk/run intervals and then spent the rest of my time on the elliptical.  

At over 21 weeks pregnant, I suppose it's bound to happen.  Days where I need to adjust my plan, pull back and take it easier.  

You might think that since I can be kind of hard core about exercise, that this would be hard for me.  But it's really not.  I'm thoroughly enjoying this stage of exercise.  My priority is this beautiful little miracle growing inside me.  It's a relief and a privilege for me to exercise without added pressures of a race or a fitness goal. I actually feel like for me, pregnancy is a time to build up reserves of fitness intensity, so that when the time is right, I'll have these reserves to call upon.   

After seeing my chiropractor and massage therapist I felt a lot better on the treadmill today and ran for 30 minutes.  Then I did 20 minutes elliptical and some upper body strength training.  One thing I have lots of these days is TIME, with both my kids in school all day.  I usually spend my mornings at the gym, taking my time doing cardio, strength training, spin class, yoga or whatever else I feel like that day.  It's as much a social and emotional need that is filled, as it is a physical.  The gym has become my place to visit with other women and be around people.  It's a fun environment for me to spend some of that time.

I'm also still teaching boot camps and doing some personal training.  I love my boot camp girls (yep, that's you if you're reading this) and I enjoy sharing some of my love of fitness.  I know lots of people exercise because they feel like they should or because they want to lose weight but I love seeing a shift in people where they also exercise because they start to LOVE IT.  Not just as a chore but as something they might even call FUN.  I feel like the same shift can happen with eating.  Where you start to eat healthy because you love how that food tastes and you love nourishing your body.  When these shifts happen, healthy living is no longer a burden but a joy and a privilege.  Truly, these bodies of ours are amazing miracles and caring for them is one of the greatest challenges but also the greatest opportunities of LIFE.