Life Lessons From The Pool.

Today at swim club we did time trials.  This is my first time starting off the swim block in a timed event.  It's also my first time being timed at short distances (I'm used to longer distance swims in triathlons.)

On our last 50 m, my dad asked to move up into my heat, so that he could race against me.  He had that "Harding gleam" in his eye, excited for some family competition.  He dived out in front of me off the blocks but I made sure to beat him.  Our coach seemed to find our banter funny, as she was giggling when we finished up.  Beyond the friendly competition, I had some "aha" moments.

The pictures have little to nothing to do with my points...

 When I get tired, it's harder to keep good technique.  I often revert to old habits.
Those old habits are buried underneath layers of all the new things I've learned and as I get tired, the layers start to peel away.  I start entering the water across my body, it gets hard to keep my elbow high and I don't glide as much with each pull.  Basically I start swimming how I used to swim  In life when I either try to do too much or don't get enough sleep, my life skills revert and get ugly too.  I sometimes see this in friends as well, who with good intentions, want to give their children lots of good skills and experiences but get too busy and stressed in the process.

Do it for as long as you can do it well, then take a break and come back to it refreshed.

I used to only do long sets in the pool.  In Ironman training, I would often swim 3,000 km straight sets.  This meant that I was swimming about 400 m with good technique and 2,600 m with progressively sloppier technique.  In swim club, we do smaller sets and switch up the strokes.  For example today the main set was 4 x 200 IM (2 x 50 drill, 50 kick, 50 swim).  It is a shorter, more focused effort on a specific skill and then you switch to something else before you get tired and sloppy.  This principle of variety and shorter focused effort applies to life.  In fact, that is how I like to clean.  I don't like to clean for long periods of time. I like to do it in shorter "bursts" here and there.

Best to learn it right the first time.  Bad habits are hard to break...but they can be broken, there is hope.
I LOVE the dolphin kick.  It's seriously so fun!  I've never tried it before and I'm glad I haven't because I came to it with a clean slate.  My coach showed me the proper motion on the first day of swim club.  (Originates in the core, really roll the hips down to the toes in a fluid motion.)  I picked it up quickly.  One reason for this is I had no bad habits to break.  In fact, I'm progressing quickly in the breast and fly for the same reason.  Freestyle is a lot harder because my stroke is so ingrained in me.  It's like someone trying to teach you to walk differently, when you've been walking a certain way for years.  Not easy.  But not impossible either.  I am learning and changing, teaching my brain and body new habits.  I felt this principle in our first year of marriage.  I felt that the habits that Adam and I set that year were going to be important.  We had a clean slate back then.  Fortunately in life and in swimming, there is still hope to break bad habits, it's just harder than setting them right the first time.

To be fast in the water, you need to be relaxed and take advantage of the glide and recovery.  
Sometimes I forget that and I think that if I give more effort, I'll go faster.  Only effective effort makes you faster.  Slugging it out like a panicked, drowning person isn't fast and it isn't effective.  I know this because in the races where I'm calm and relaxed and smooth, I always have a faster time.  Whereas when I start forcing it and stroking too fast, I tire and end up being slower because of sloppy effort.  Trouble is, I keep forgetting this principle.  Like this morning in the pool, I wanted to be fast and forgot to be smooth and relaxed.  In life, I am at my best when my efforts are used at things that help me move closer to my goals and when I take advantage of the "recovery" phases.  In my life, this looks like making sure I have some "down time" each day so that when I need to be on, I'm on.

Improvement comes little by little...sometimes it feels so meticulous it's ridiculous!
 I catch myself doubting these little improvements.  Like when my coach says, "roll a little more in the water", I think sometimes, "can a little more roll really make a difference?"  It takes a certain amount of trust too, to believe that small changes here and there will really add up.  I sometimes think, "oh, the way I'm doing it has gotten me this far, no need to change."  But that's not the way to improvement.  I need to let go of old ways and trust in higher wisdom.
I only improve as a swimmer, when I'm willing to make these LITTLE CHANGES.

Life's shifts.

Life is funny.

Every stage is so unique.  Each with it's own challenges, adventures and opportunities.  Each requires shifting of time and priorities.

Since being a mother, I have found that for me, exercise is such an important piece of the puzzle.  It has helped me to recover mentally and physically from having babies.  It has given me an outlet.  Triathlon has given me a pursuit.  Triathlon has become such a part of me that I think I will view myself as a triathlete for a long, long time. (I hope!)

This past year, triathlon has shifted to become a larger focus in my life than ever before.  Training for and racing in Ironman Cozumel was a treasured experience for me and Adam.  I have an athlete's drive inside of me and that pursuit gave fire to that drive.

Lately I've had a nudging in my heart, telling me that it's time for another shift.  I have learned to rely on these nudgings, as I feel like they come from God.  Often they feel like simple, sweet messages that come over and over.  Often they are different from the direction I was headed and as I start to listen and put action and words to the promptings, I feel a sweet peace wash over me.

My heart is telling me that it's time to shift more of myself back to my home and my children.

So, it began on Saturday.  I had a 1 hour run scheduled and Adam had a 2 hour bike.  Normally we would head to the gym first thing in the morning and get our workouts done (with the kids in child care) and then spend the rest of the day together as a family.  Instead we decided that I would run home from the kid's dentist appt in Midnapore and Adam would ride while we watched a family movie that night.  That way, we could give our fresh morning selves to the kids and enjoy breakfast and a lazy morning together.  Most importantly, we were trying to follow the promptings.  The day was less than perfect (as family days often are) but I feel peace in this new shift and I know that it's not so much the day to day results but what matters more is what happens in the long run.

I love my family.  I love my kids.  I love my husband.  I love being a mother.  I love being a triathlete.  I don't have to give any of these up because all of these things (and more) are important parts of who I am.  I know that each stage of life will require small and great shifts.  I trust in God to help me figure it all out.

 Picture is after a triathlon that me and Adam did together 4 years ago.

Craving Creativity

I've been craving creativity lately.

So the result of these cravings is a painting and a poem.

I completed this painting last week.  I had seen similar paintings at the Ironman Cozumel Expo.  Adam suggested I just paint one up for us, rather than paying a bunch of money and trying to protect it on the airplane ride home.  Plus, I love having my own artwork up on our walls.
The idea for the poem came as I was doing my long run last weekend (19 km). I realized that my love of running started long ago (back in the university days) and I have only come to love it more recently.

I RUN

In the stillness of the morning air, I run. 

My thoughts blur in the rhythm of the music and I feel invisible, free. 

As if I’ve somehow been carried to a different sphere where the runner’s reside.

We nod to one another as we pass, strangers but not.

I grow lighter as life’s weights scatter on the ground behind.

The runner’s spell heals my mind.

Between songs I hear my feet on the pavement and I remember…

A younger girl, so fresh and bright

Eager to learn, to live, to love.

Her future before her, calling with hopeful expectation.

Life’s confusing ebbs and flows, forcing growth.

“Just run” was the call and a runner was born.

The years have passed and I’m a runner still.

Like a loyal friend, we’ve passed the years together.

Even now, we’ve grown closer.  

Less pain with newfound ease, as if I’ve learned to fly.

The air turns warmer as minutes pass by.

I take in a full breath, filling my lungs with a small piece of eternity.

The rhythm of the pavement comforts me.

The effort reminds me I am strong.

I run.

Just run.

              (This is the incredible view from fish creek ridge I get on my evening runs.)
Ok, so for those of you who live near me, did you know how beautiful it is up on the fish creek park ridge when the sun is setting?  As beautiful as that view is, I did learn that it is creepy running down by the river after the sun sets with only moonlight and little animals scattering nearby....very creepy.

So, I wanted to share my story of how and when I fell in love with running.

It was when I was living in Geneva, Switzerland and working as a nanny.  We were having a friendly little family weight loss competition, so I woke up before work and ran almost every morning. At first, I ran with the outcome prevalent in my mind. For example, I wanted to run for a particular amount of time without stopping and my mind was consumed with this desired result. I also wanted to lose a certain amount of weight and I worried whether or not this would happen. I was discouraged when I started to feel pain because I doubted my ability to keep running and  I was weighed down by the discrepancy between where I was at and where I wanted to be.  Essentially, the discrepancy between the moment and the desired result brought despair to the moment.

One day, while running along and commencing my habitual obsession with how much longer I needed to run and how much it hurt, I had these clear words come into my mind, "JUST RUN".  That was the key for me and I have experienced running differently ever since.  I have learned to enjoy being in the moment when I run, without obsessing about the future.  I have learned to relax into my running and allow myself to be mentally present.  I have learned that in running, as in life, the future will be what it will be but worrying about it only holds the present hostage. I am not perfect at this but that's ok too.

I learned this lesson nine years ago but this morning while biking at the gym, I read this same principle stated differently in my book, "The Triathletes Guide to Mental Training".  It states
"Many triathletes believe that by focusing on the outcome, that is, on a certain result, they're more likely to achieve that outcome.  Having an outcome focus, however, actually hurts performance and makes it less likely you'll achieve your goals.  Every time you shift from a process focus to an outcome focus, your performance will decline."

I believe in setting goals.  I also believe that we need to live in the present, even though the long term goal will always be in the back of our mind.  When a goal feels overwhelming, it needs to be broken up into smaller, more manageable goals so that we can do what needs to be done in the moment and live in the moment and most of all, enjoy the moment.